I’m not having a good day….at least that’s been my mindset most of the afternoon.  To start with I don’t particularly feel good physically. My nose has been dripping like a faucet and I’m not really sleeping all that great.  I’m fighting those hot flashy things they say happen to women who are middle age.

RANDOM THOUGHT….(humor me please)…. I honestly don’t know who came up with the term…..middle age? I prefer just saying young or old but I guess I am neither.  Why not call that middle part of life …..the heart of life….or the heart of existence….or the heart of living?  I truly think that’s better than middle age.

Anyway, are the hot flashes happening because we women of a certain maturity (in the heart of life) have finally arrived and that means we’re so hot we’re smoking?  I wish.  Melt is more likely the correct term.  In these frigid temps we have been suffering, I decided to pull out some lady long johns since I am a whiner when it comes to being cold. I wore them comfortably yesterday, but today is another story.  Can I just say….a female (in the heart of life)…enduring hot flashes….as the temperature rises…..sporting two layers of clothing…..with a sweaty neck, palms, and pits is not pretty.  If you passed me on the ride home you probably thought you passed a happy cocker spaniel driving and hanging out the window at the same time.

The hot flash element was only a snippet of my “blah” day….the discomfort of my socks that were too short to meet my lady long johns has greatly distressed me all day.  There was an inch wide portion of my round little calves that felt neglected on what has got to be the longest work day in my entire life.

RANDOM THOUGHT……(I’m sorry…)….I am not cooking supper tonight.

Where was I? Oh yea…my “blah” day keeps getting better.  I needed to get gas on the way home but it was just too dad blamed cold to stop….even though I am emitting heat capriciously at any given moment….it doesn’t take long for me to erratically start freezing.  I guess I’ll coast to work in the morning cause it’s going to be cold tomorrow morning too…..and I’m not wearing the lady long johns.

I could go on and on whining about my day…..I mean there was last nights leftovers for lunch today that left me with a vicious case of heartburn.  My thoughtful husband uses way too much grease for porch chops. There were inconveniences and forgetful moments and frustrations…..and can you believe that yesterday somebody threw the box of chocolates that were on my desk away?  That was probably a God thing although I am still sulking 24 hours later.  Anyway, I think you get my drift.

Ever had a day like this?  It starts out ok but one little discomfort or aggravation and it all goes down hill.  I caught myself whining about my discomforts and pretty soon I had talked myself into a bad attitude…..and invariably a bad mood.   When we get in a fog and only focus on the negative, its hard to see the positive isn’t it?  What bothers me the most is…..I spent time in prayer and bible study this morning just like I always do before I leave for work.  How in the world could I end up with a bad attitude mid morning after I had started my day with Jesus?  That is so frustrating to me. 

It was not until I walked in my door that I realized I had been brooding all day.  Immediately my little pup, “Cool Hand Luke” aka “Lukie” came running to greet me as he usually does.  Now this is the sweetest most affectionate puppy that we have ever owned.  He is the perfect child.  He is always glad to see me.  He doesn’t talk back….and he doesn’t ask for money! Perfect!  Anyway, I came in and basically ignored him because I was having a……

 RANDOM THOUGHT.  I seriously think I am the only person in this house that feeds and waters this dog. 

The first thing I noticed was his empty water bowl.  There it was….the negative….there I was…ignoring this sweet little thing that was jumping all over me and wanting to love me.  He kept jumping and jumping and I couldn’t ignore him any longer.  I picked him up and suddenly realized the pathetic state I had been in all day.

As Lukie squirmed and wiggled in my arms trying to lick my face I asked the Lord….”What is wrong with me Lord?  What is wrong with me?   Why have I murmured all day?”  And as sure as I’m typing this word this very moment…he answered….

“Because you shifted your focus from me….to yourself Mel.”

Yep….in all my physical discomforts…..the inconveniences ……the nuisances…… I relegated all that misery to highlight all the negatives around me.  Everything in my environment was getting worse by the minute because my attitude was getting worse……all because I was focused on me. Has that ever happened to you?  Gosh…I’m pretty sure this isn’t the first time I have fell into this slimy old pit of self, self, self.

Immediately I told the Lord I was sorry.  I had to spend some time renewing my mind.  I had to put my focus back on him.  I asked him to give me wisdom to catch myself the next time I started having sour thoughts.  HE reminded me of the scripture; “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever  is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable….if anything is excellent or praiseworthy….think on these things.”  Phillipians 4:8
There was absolutely nothing true or noble…right or pure in my thoughts today.  I had a bad case of stinking thinking for sure.

“When we allow our focus to shift from God to self, our mind becomes fertile ground for the negative thoughts to take root and grow.”

God please help me to remember this….help me keep my focus on you….. to think your thoughts about all the negatives that I may face in my life…..at all times.  The next time I have a “blah” day….I’m giving it to you Lord.

RANDOM THOUGHT…..I need some ice cream.

                                                                 “Cool Hand Luke”