Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins. 1 Peter 4:8
I was blindsided by my friend’s verbal assault. Her words stung, piercing my heart in disbelief and grief. The disagreement was silly. She was observing my whining and interjected with her opinion. I learned what she really thought of me in a spray of less than truthful and unfair words.
Later I asked her forgiveness for sounding as though I was frustrated at her. My complaint had nothing to do with my friend, yet she reacted as though it did. A simple yes was the reply to my apology.
An apology I truly did not feel as though I owed her; however, I extended the olive branch and received no apology in return.
Friendship is sticky at times. We go through the valleys and peaks of day to day comradery, but what do we do when the other party is not sorry for their offenses?
My friend’s lack of remorse was as hurtful as her words. My reaction was to cool it with our friendship. I fretted to the point of sleeplessness the entire night.
I felt the righteous indignation rising in my spirit like a roaring fire. As the sun came up the next morning, I found myself crying out to Jesus.
I did not want to be her friend any longer. I wanted to walk away from the friendship.
As I prayed while fighting the distractions of raw feelings, I heard the Spirit whisper…..
“What if Jesus had walked away?”
Somewhere between my broken heart and the Holy Spirit’s conviction, I realized walking away from our friendship was not an option.
Turning the other cheek was hard to swallow.
I found myself wanting to clue her in on a few details she didn’t know about the situation. I wanted to chide her for not apologizing in return. I yearned to offend and taunt her with guilt, noting she didn’t value our friendship as much as I did.
Over and over the Lord told me to leave it alone and ignore my rights to defense.
In the grand scheme of eternity, it’s not going to matter if I get the last word or not.
It’s not going to matter if I never receive an apology either; however, it will matter if my pride gets the best of me.
Choosing to let conflict go without a defense doesn’t make us weak…..it makes us obedient, but more importantly, it pleases our Lord.
Friendship is humbling at times, yet we are called to serve and love one another, overlooking each other’s faults….after all……
Jesus overlooked ours.
2 thoughts on ““When They Don’t Say I’m Sorry””
Oh Melanie, I’ve been here more than once. And I ALWAYS have to have the last word…well, I used to, anyway. I will say I’ve gotten better, but it is not easy and it does hurt. I’ve had sleepless nights over friendships (not that long ago…) and it’s a precarious place to be. I love your reminder that Jesus didn’t give up on us…and loved us through our mess and our faults. What a beautiful truth to live in, especially when those we love hurt us. Thank you for sharing! <3
Yes sweet Meredith – that last word is so hard to walk away from – but when HE started helping me do so – HE gave me an unexplanable peace – and instead of my insides exploding – I was okay- you know? Thank you for your encouragement and for stopping by dear one. Your genuiness is so real in your own writing – love your honest heart. blessings and hugs dear one! 😘🙏☝️